A Broken Trust


I don’t think we realize it, but there are times where we try to do things our own way. Whatever situation we are facing, or whatever it is we’re battling with, we always tend to think of how we can fix the situation or problem. In the end we make more of a mess than what we began with, and then that feeling of hopelessness settles in. Sometimes God has a way of tiring us out, or getting us to that place of not knowing what to do anymore. As if we’ve exhausted all of our options. I don’t know why it’s so difficult to turn to God when life becomes a bit too much, but all in all we’re the one’s who make it difficult. This is how I like to picture it, God sitting in a chair watching us…hearing us, but mainly waiting on us to actually cry out to Him. It may take a while for us to even get to this point, but eventually we are faced with having to pray to God and allowing Him peer into our lives to see what is going on.

“Oh what little faith you have Maria”. Those words ring in my head each time something big or minor happens in my life, because in my head I tend to question God even more after I had just prayed on the situation. It takes faith in knowing God can handle any situation that comes our way, and He never looks at the size of the situation as often as we do. He is God. Period.

Maybe we’ve been praying on a situation, and trusting that God will take care of it even though nothing has changed. I believe there are times where God tests our faith, He wants to see what it is we’ll do when facing a certain situation in our lives. Will we turn to Him? Will we pray? Or simply walk away with the intentions of fixing the problem on our own? If you’re anything like me, then I usually go straight for the “I got this” when really I can’t even get a grip on life. I have to admit, it’s hard to trust in something/someone whom you can’t physically see or feel. If we just allowed God to filter into our lives, if we just gave Him 10 minutes of our time, I believe thing’s would start to change. Our attitudes, behaviors, and having more faith that God can make the impossible possible.

Matthew 21:22

And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive.

Hebrews 11:1

Now faith is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

There are many scripture that talk about having faith, and trusting in God. Hebrews 11:1 is personally one of my favorites. “The evidence of things not seen” hits home for me. The generation today is more of a “need to feel, need to hear, and need to see” type, which is fine and all but it should be different when it comes to God. Meditate on Hebrews 11:1, and put it into your own words of what that verse means to you. Some would say that it’s pretty self-explanatory, but any verse in the bible can be translated/viewed differently.

Hope you all have a blessed day, and take care.




Whenever I find myself wandering, and sometimes it’s usually away from God. I feel as if he has this hold on me, like a rope around my heart, pulling me back and asking “Where are you going?”. I’m not quite sure how to describe it without sounding…weird I guess. It’s like having a toddler, when you go somewhere that is over packed with people you want to make sure that your child is insight. You want to make sure that you can see them, and see where it is they’re going. You don’t want to lose the, or want anything bad happening to them. So you either put them in a stroller, strap them in, or get them a backpack with one of those leash things (which most parents aren’t a fan of, but if you’re over protective then the whole back pack thing may just be the thing).

It’s like God has a leash on us, and when we begin to stray he sees just how far we’ll go before pulling us back to Him.  At some point we even begin to realize how much we really need Him, and that we can’t make it through this thing called “life” without His guidance. Romans 8:39 speaks to me, this is what it says…

Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

There is nothing that could separate us from God, and I mean NOTHING. Just when we think we’ve lost our way, or that we no longer feel worthy, God is standing right there. Waiting for you. People come in go out of our lives, some leave scars, and some just have to go for whatever reason. When everything seems to be falling apart, and no one understands, we will always have this hope. The hope that someone will always be there no matter what may come, no matter what we do, and no matter how we’ve been living. God has you. Sometimes we need to go through stuff in order to be brought back down to our knees, and admit that we are nothing without Jesus.

We all have choices to make, and sometimes we aren’t always sure that we are making the right choices. Whatever we do will lead us down different paths, but that’s where we gain experience as an individual. It’s how we grow spiritually, mentally, and physically. This is why I believe God allows us to wander, but not so far out, because there are some paths that can lead to destruction or even ruin. Wherever you are, whatever you’re doing, know that Jesus is waiting for you. He’s waiting for you to talk to Him, and He yearns to hear how you’re doing and where you’ve been. Even though He is with us 24/7, He want’s nothing more than to hear it come from you personally. There’s power when we admit to certain things in our lives that we are not proud of, thing’s that have caught us off guard. Jesus holds us until we learn to relax, to be calm, and to know that everything is going to be alright. We just have to rest in Him, and trust that He is leading us back to the heart of Worship.

Like they say…

Not All Who Wander Are Lost.

Rising From The Rubble

There are no more excuses, no more apologies, and no more promises.

I drifted way, and during this whole time I truly believed that what I thought was right was wrong. I had this strong belief that I was doing everything that I was supposed to be doing, that God was leading me in the right direction. It was as if I was finally finding myself, my true self.

That wasn’t the case.

I had drifted so far from God that I was pushing others out of my life. My church attendance was significantly low, my prayer life was no longer a prayer life, and reading the word…I just stopped. At this point, I became numb. Church on Sunday’s became just church to me, I no longer had the desire to go to church. I began to question God, I was frustrated with who I was becoming as a person. I didn’t like myself, I didn’t like the fact that I was pushing everyone that I loved away and out of my life. It’s as if I settled into this mini depression, and I hadn’t even realized it.

It never really occurred to me just how easily and how quickly one can drift away from God. No wonder why so many of our young people are walking away from the church, there’s just too much going on that it’s become a war zone for our young people. How do we fix this? How do bring the one’s who have left back to church? Times are changing, and I feel like our generation today is looking for acceptance. They’re looking for some type of reassurance that they are worthy, and that they do matter regardless of their past mistakes. People within the church should not be pointing fingers, gossiping, or telling someone that they’re living a sinful life. Those who point a finger at you should examine themselves first, and realize that they themselves are not all that perfect.

For those who have ever been put down, beaten down, talked down on, or even looked down on. You’re worth so much more than that. Find the strength to get up, rise up, and have faith that God will work everything out for the better. There’s no need for you to measure up to someone else’s standards, or even please them just so they like you a little bit more. Whatever you do, do unto God. So if it’s been a while since you’ve prayed, or even worshipped Him. Give Him some time today, let Him know what exactly is going on within you. Be silent, be fervent, but also be patient. You may not understand now, but He will show you down the road as to why you went through that specific trial.

As for myself I know I am still battling with somethings, and I know it’ll take time to be where I need to be.

In conclusion, I want to inform you of something. Something very very important, and this is…The devil is a liar, no more paying attention to him.

God Bless